Hello My Dear Kallas, עמו”ש

 

!א גוטן חודש

As soon as Purim is cleaned up and put away, ב”ה , we are on to the next.

Our lives are just like that….

I remember once walking into Michael’s (a local craft store), on July 5th, and watching the employees taking down all of the July 4th decorations and merchandise, while others started the Halloween aisles.  (Halloween is at the end of October {for the non-out-of-towners!}). And I remember thinking… That’s the next big holiday in their world???

We go from שבת to שבת and many ימים טובים and significant days throughout the year.  All of which need a lot of preparation and energy!

There are some preparations and efforts that are common to all of us this time of year. The cleaning, the clothing, the errands, for many it’s cooking…

But then there is the inside work that we do, the work in our head, and that’s where we are each going to have our own, individualized “track”.  Because we each have our own lives, and our own individualized challenges and work to do.

When we get to a Yom tov like Pesach, where there is a lot of intensity, and let’s be honest, pressure (who me???)  besides for the external work that has to get done, we need to reach deep inside ourselves to do the internal work to get all of that done with simcha and equilibrium.

Our demands of ourselves can be really high, and the expectations that we have of those around us.

We need things to get done, and we might need them to get done at a specific time, in a specific way, and the person we ask to do them might have to have a specific attitude towards all of our requests (overjoyed, thrilled, eager, {ha!})

Often, it isn’t done how I want, when I want, in the way I want, or even done at all…. (Am I the only one?)

As Pesach gets closer, and my list of things that have to get done isn’t shrinking fast enough, my tolerance level and patience can shrink…

The external stuff, the food, the clothing, the clean חמץ free house, are things that people might (or might not) appreciate, comment on, or compliment.

But the real work, the inside work; only I know that.

Only I know what strength it took to be good to myself,

to compliment myself,

to celebrate what I did NOT say when it was really really hard, and on the tip of my tongue.

Only I know how I felt when I was so tired and pushed myself that little bit more.

Those שיעורים that I listen to, really do help me, and give me the spiritual dimension that can get so lost in the bleach, oven cleaner, and potato peels.

Only I know that at the end of this יום טוב, I will be a better, stronger, kinder, person; more rooted in my אמונה, and more grateful to הקב”ה.

Because only I know what is truly inside of me, and the accomplishments that I am so proud of.

Many years ago, we began what has become a family custom at this point, at my request.

At the very last Yom Tov meal, on the 7th day of Pesach, I request that our family once again sing חסל סידור פסח, usually only sung at the end of the  סדרים.

And here is what I am thinking as they sing.

Hashem, I did it.

I really did it again.

Actually, We did it.

Thank you for giving me the כח.

Thank you for giving me the means to do this.

Thank you for all of the wonderful people in my life that I can do this for.

Thank you for trusting me with Your children.

Thank you for all of the people that call me Mommy

Thank you for all of the people that call me Bubby.

Thank you for letting me share this beautiful time with my husband

And our parents (until 120)

And thank you for all of the opportunities to grow.

Hashem, only You and I knew what it took

And may I be זוכה to do it all over again next year in ירושלים!

Wishing each of you a חג כשר ושמח!

 

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